Dear Dad,
I don’t even know where to begin. I miss you terribly. My heart aches to hear your voice, to hold your hand, to see your name pop up on my phone. I miss your hugs, your laugh, the way you would show up for everything in my life.
To be your daughter has been the biggest honor, privilege and something I can’t let go of. I need you still. We need you still. I don’t think I’ll ever understand this end to your story. But then I am reminded that your story has no end. In fact, you worked so hard to change the trajectory of your life, so that your story could live on in your children, your children’s children and so on. Not only will it live on with your family, but with your friends, your employees, and even the strangers you came across on a daily basis.
I didn’t get to say thank you before you entered your forever home, so this is my attempt at letting the world know just how incredibly lucky I was to be one your “cute blondes”.
Dad,
thank you for showing up everyday of my life. I think back of the way you would pray with me every night while I lived under your roof…even into my teenage years. You would listen for hours on hours about my day or my concerns. You had an open door policy. I always knew, no matter what, you’d take my call or me showing up to your office unannounced. I remember not being able to look at you (still couldn’t do this day) anytime I sang on stage because you would have tears streaming down your face…every single time. Every dream we had in our hearts, you championed. You sat us down and counseled us through decisions. My goodness, I miss you, daddy.
I remember the way you loved your family with every part of you. Everyone knew we were your number one priority. We were everything to you….and you were everything to us.
Thank you for the way you would take care of me. Here are just a couple of things you did.
- When I would come home from college, you insisted on driving me back because you knew how tired I was. You would drive and I would sleep. You’d fly home and now, looking back and having my own kids, I think it was your way of making sure I was safe.
- In high school, thank you for seeing me and my friends in a restaurant and paying for our meal. Thank you for washing and detailing my car on a weekly basis and sneaking cash in little places to surprise me and then acting like you didn’t know what I was talking about when I would thank you.
- Thank you for always embracing and loving my friends as your own. You hugged them, celebrated them and found ways to pay for their school, meals, extras on their honeymoons, trips and fundraisers…you took care of anyone who had a need. ANYONE.
- Thank you for walking with me through my darkest days and never giving up on me. You saw the good in me. Fought for me and believed the best…always. You lifted my head many times and spoke “you are a good girl” when I believed less.
- You always slipped $100 bill in my purse or my console when I left home and always encouraged me to carry cash and put some away. Thank you for always preparing me for the future and the bigger picture.
- Thank you for always responding to any need in our circle and in the world. You were literally the most generous man I’ve ever known and will ever know.
- Thank you for installing a shelter and a generator at our home so that we would always have a place of shelter in storms and a source to keep our home warm and running.
- Thank you for taking care of all of our children’s therapy appointments, schooling, birthday parties…you refused to let us pay. You took care of us in every little detail.
The list could go on and on and on and on…there is nobody like you. I just still can’t believe you are gone. I don’t know what life is like without you and I don’t want to find out. I am broken and sad. I’m mad and frustrated and in the same breath, I’m overwhelmed with gratitude that I got you for 40 years of my life. I got to know the love of a heavenly Father through the life of my earthly Father. Thank you for pointing me and others to Him every single day of your life. The moment you met Jesus, your life was never the same and everyone around you knew that. You have been my world for so long…all of our world. I’m not sure how we are going to do it without you. I ache for you. To have one last hug…one last kiss on the cheek…one last “I love you honey”.
You served this world well. I can’t imagine the homecoming you received the moment you took your last breath. I know the Father was so proud to welcome you home. You were His hands and feet while you were on this earth. I long for heaven more than I ever have. I dream of our reunion. I dream of you seeing your sweet wife again. We will take good care of her. You have nothing to worry about. We’ve got her and she’s go us.
I love you dad. I truly was the luckiest girl to have ever lived, having you as a father. Well done, good and faithful servant.
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